I'M NOT DEAD, YET!

"Be happy while you're living, for you're a long time dead."

-- Old Scottish Proverb

Serious illness is SERIOUS, pardon the pun. I do not mean to be facetious nor generalise, but I am not talking about the everyday aches and pains, sniffles and coughs or mysterious "I'm not feeling quiet right" ailments. Of course, if we feel out of sorts, it is our individual responsibility to consult a medical practitioner and if one is a parent it is equally imperative that we seek-out medical treatment for our child.

As every woman will attest, a vast majority of men/ husbands become whimpering babies whenever the slightest inkling of illness is apparent and I am willing to acknowledge that I, myself, can be a bit of a wuss when it comes to a cold or flu .. yes, dear reader, I actually crawl into my bed and proclaim loudly for ALL to hear that: "I am DYING!"

The old adage: "Healthy in Mind, Healthy in Body", comes to mind (pun intended) and I am quiet aware that this statement alone leaves me open to ridicule from many ... but who gives a fig.

The most common psychological illness is "burnout".

"Those who are experiencing high amounts of stress in their lifestyle need to always be aware of the idea of burnout potentially looming in the future. While the term 'burnout' is often thrown around in discussions of stress, do you really know what it means, and how it's caused?

The term "burnout" is a relatively new term, first coined in 1974 by Herbert Freudenberger, in his book, "Burnout: The High Cost of High Achievement". He originally defined 'burnout' as, "the extinction of motivation or incentive, especially where one's devotion to a cause or relationship fails to produce the desired results."

While burnout isn't a recognized clinical psychiatric or psychological disorder, there are some similar features between burnout and diagnosable conditions such as depression, anxiety disorders or mood disorders. However, burnout is much more common; for example, it's estimated that 25%-60% of practicing physicians experience burnout! It's also less severe, more temporary in duration, and clearly caused by situational stressors rather than a biologically mandated chemical imbalance. (It's kind of like depression's non-clinical, less intense cousin that just comes for a visit and leaves when you reduce the stress in your life.)"


Source: http://stress.about.com/od/burnout/a/stressn_burnout.htm

Last year (14th November 2009 to be exact),I was involved in a Wonderful Festival Event which initially was my conceptual idea. Due largely to the determination of my partner Louise (O'Brien) Lee-Price and Amethyst Treleven (leader of the Oak and Mistletoe Coven) with support from Kym and Mike Kuijpers, Alan and Caroline Peek, Andrew and Margaret, Chris and Frank (of Seventh Ray Ashram), Lord Djor, Nana Mex (of the Global Thunder Network), Dave and Merry ( Sanchez of the Global Thunder Network), Sherona Kerr and several other friends, especially Dave Smith And Cerri Lee, the Event would NEVER have happened.

Actually, dear readers, I had found myself burnt out and ill with depression. Stress had over-whelmed me and anxiety had zapped my creative enthusiasm. I was a spent force.

The Event happened and was a minor success. Not a huge success as I would of like but as I had said in the past: "From a small seed or acorn a mighty Elm or Oak will grow..." and as it will be with the Event which was titled "The Druids Dreaming 2009" and will henceforth be called The She-Oak Earth Music Festival.

Magic can Happen. Magic Does Happen. Music is Magic and Magic is Music. Music can bring about Change and Change can be Good.

As stated, if it wasn't for my partner, Louise M. Lee-Price (nee: O'Brien AKA Cosmic Dragonfly) the Druid's Dreaming event would not have occurred at all, as I was prepared to bail-out around mid-August due to aforementioned health reasons.
But wait there is more …

Allow me to try and put this all in perspective for you and by summarisation present to you a situation that I shall title: (to use a song title by the great Alice Cooper) "Welcome to My Nightmare".

Approximately around mid-August, after assuring my good friend and headline act, Damh the Bard, that the event was still set to happen, my major sponsor decided to withdraw. Coupled with the disappointment of several previous failed grants/funding submissions, the event was looking rather financially shaky. To be honest I actually threw up my arms and went and hid under the bed … it all proved to much for me. I had a minor nervous breakdown.

My Dragonfly immediately took control of the situation, snatched my Captain hat from me and took command. She would not let me give up and strongly suggested that I take a break and go with the flow.

Good advice, however, the aforementioned situation, that had me sick with stress, was not the only "hiccup" (for want of a better term) that plagued the Druids Dreaming Event.

To write a full report of "How Dragonfly Avoided The Druids Dreaming Disaster" even in summary would be an arduous task and detract from the context. I may consider writing a "warts and all" expose in the coming months yet need to forewarn the reader, it doesn't paint a particular "celebrity" in a favourable light.

Forgive my digression and please allow me dear reader to return to the main topic of this editorial/ article and in a way much has to do with aforementioned event. Besides the stress and burn-out that I was suffering from, due to the problems focused around organising and staging said event, we found ourselves in the difficult situation of organising and cleaning a hall at the Seventh Ray Ashram at Ashton the day before the Festival event for mine and Dragonfly's wedding (another story).

On the day of the ceremony, Louise drove me and five young helpers to the Ashram so we could help Chris and Frank clean the Ashram hall for the wedding reception.

The day before, Chris and Frank had "Flea Bombed" the venue, which opened up a whole new kettle of worms, namely Chemical exposure/ poisoning. Having given up smoking in September, being smack in the middle of Hay-fever season and having a extreme low immune system and low tolerance level due to stress and burn-out, the exposure resulted in Severe Sinus Disease.

Sinusitis and Hay fever are not widely acknowledged as being major illnesses and few people understand sinus diseases or appreciate the suffering of those who are symptomatic.

Simplified, Sinusitis refers to any kind of inflammation or irritation of the sinuses, so from time to time any of us can become a sufferer of a minor sinus conditions. In no way should it be construed that I am diminishing the condition or the affect that hay fever or any other sinus condition could have on an individual sufferer. It can be quiet debilitating.

Sinus Disease can cause lethargy, migraine headaches, vertigo, insomnia sleep deprivation, oxygen deprivation, heart palpitations, deafness, blindness … actually the list is endless and depends largely on the sufferers other medical history. In actual fact, it can lead to serious illness and in extreme cases … it can KILL

Am I over exaggerating? No! I am still getting over the illness and coupled with the on-going stresses over the Christmas period, it almost killed me.

The worse part of the whole episode was the panic attacks …

Please, allow me to explain. I suffer from sleep apnoea and also, have out of body experiences/ astral project. Due to the sinus disease, I quite often found it almost impossible to fall asleep (Insomnia). One of the reasons for this is a constant sound of pulsating in the ears. After a while you start feeling slightly sleep derived and as you are not get sufficient air to the ole brain (oxygen deprivation), you start feeling slightly "gaga" also.

Usually, when I stop breathing during sleep, my out of body adventure is curtailed and I find myself back in my body without incident. However, during the sinus disease illness and as my sinuses were all blocked up, I found myself being slam-dunked back into my body and being awoken with a panic attack gasping for air.

It would then, take me several hours to calm myself down, so I could at least attempt to get back to sleep. Next morning, we would have sleep deprivation, lethargy and worse, vertigo happening.

Sinus Disease - Google search: http://www.google.com.au/search?q=Sinus+Disease+&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-GB:official&client=firefox-a

So, dear reader, if you have been wondering what happened to the newsletter? Well, you see, I do not have a loyal staff to cover for me and put the newsletter together and although she tries hard, even my Dragonfly isn't Wonder Woman, so what we have is an online publication that disappears into the Cyber void for a period of time whilst the editor recovers.

I will inform all and sundry, that as I haven't got a loyal staff and I am really not getting paid to publish this newsletter, I have decided from now on to publish it at my leisure and bi-monthly.


… Oh, and in passing, if I ever do die, don't expect to read it in the Newsletter because if I do drop dead, although I will know before you, I will not be in a position to pass the information on.

Blessings and May Your Gods and Goddesses Watch Over YOU and Yours

If you want to change the world my friends change your thinking first.

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