Welcome to my column Ask Witch Weezie!

I am a no holds barred Pagan Agony Aunt/Counsellor offering practical advice, truth your mother is too afraid to give you. I answer the questions your friends shy away from with the subtlety of a sledgehammer. My perspective and opinions differ to other counsellors because Biology and the natural state is always taken into account. Sometimes a fresh perspective is all that is needed when faced with a challenge that is seemingly insurmountable.

Dear Witch Weezie,

My girlfriend wants me to go through some binding ceremony that binds us together but I do not know if I want to be with her anymore. Earlier in our relationship I cheated on her. Our relationship was not working and I slept with my ex who I have a strong connection with.. She said she forgave me but every time we have a fight she throws it in my face.
Now we are fighting every second day. I want to break up but my girlfriend asked me to give her two more months to improve her behaviour. I have a connection with this girl but should I be bound to her?

Well Zenith what a tangled web you have woven for yourself. You do not go into much detail as to the length of time you have been with your girlfriend or how early in the relationship you cheated. That sort of information will help in giving you a clearer answer. You also do not say what kind of binding you are speaking of so I am assuming your girlfriend means a hand fasting though if she were to mean binding the two of you together another way this advice would be the same.

Your girlfriend obviously has trust issues. The cheating would have caused that or maybe she already had them. She feels that a handfasting (the action of that) will show her you are committed to the relationship and will hopefully put her mind at ease. A handfasting is a commitment, which you are clearly not ready for as it seems you are looking for a way out rather than a way to fix the problems in your relationship. Your girlfriend is clearly not over the hurt she felt when you cheated but I do not know why you have given her another two months for anything as you are just prolonging her pain.

Dear Witch Weezie

I follow a path that has three degrees of Initiation. I have completed my second degree and I am working  hard toward my third. The third degree is The Great Rite and I am not looking forward to it. I am a lesbian. I do not see why my initiator cannot be a woman. I find that this is an huge issue for me. I have spoken with my mentor and she says she understands but the tradition is between man and woman and it will not change to accommodate me. What should I do? How can I make them change their minds?
Nervous Initiate

I understand your nervousness but the Great Rite is not about sex between a man and woman. The Great Rite is about immortality through the creation of life (therefore we live on) and the connection between ourselves and the God/dess in harmony. with nature. Being a Lesbian is natural to you, however you must bare in mind it is not natural for everyone. I am very interested to know what Tradition does not fear the wrath of an irate gay person trying to force a change within its ranks as I wish to join it. What I do not understand is why you are working so hard toward a degree you do not believe in or will not undergo unless it changes its core principles for you.

I have two suggestions for you.

1. Keep studying. You may come to an understanding as to what the Great Rite is and it may change your perspective.

2. Find a tradition more suited to your sexuality keeping in mind that it is not up to traditions to accommodate your sexual desires. That is a personal choice. One you have made for yourself. Therefore it is you that is responsible for making certain you are following a tradition that is suitable, as it is obviously an issue for you.

Dear Witch Weezie

I am a new mum. My beautiful little girl is 9 weeks old now. I feel tired and I am not sleeping well but I donot wish to take any drugs or anything that affects my daughter as I am breast feeding. Do you have any suggestions?
New Mum

Well first off New Mum. Congratulations on your lovely baby girl! How wonderful for you.
Make sure you follow up on your post natal care and speak to yur doctor about how you are feeling. Keep in touch with the community nurses too. They are a wealth of knowledge and are always there to lend a helping hand to new mums.

I would suggest plenty of rest. Your body has been through a trial. Drink hot milk with two teaspoons of sugar before bed. This is an old folk remedy that encourages the production of melatonin. If you do not like the taste try Horlicks or Milo made entirely with milk.

For energy find a breast feeding friendly vitamin B tablet. Blackmores have an executive B. Always check that it is ok to take while breastfeeding. If you do not have any dietary issues I would also eat porridge for breakfast everyday. You can add fruit, honey, and yoghurt to make it different each day. It is every new mothers greatest energy builder. Most of all just look after yourself and your baby and do not stress about the little things. A happy mother makes a happy baby. Good luck.

If you are desperate enough to ask Witch Weezie for help or just want to throw some ideas out there write to witchweezie@y7mail.com  Please write your question in the subject bar.
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